Merry Xmas!

Check out the mix and..
Don't forget to screw the light bulb!

Jingle Bells! Jingle Bells!

Merry Xmas, Bhangroids!

Mix: Oh Mera Hit Hit Boom Pump it! (Givmimani Hrvatski Mix)

Here we go!
Oh Mere Boom Boom Pump It Giv Mi Mani Hrvatski Mix (Low Quality Unfinished)
Pump it, baby!
For pumping iron or housework (the latter optional)
Yes, baby, I like that broomstick you got there... ha ha ha!

Pop back later again - the mix might evolve...

Who remembers the "Red Stripe man"?

Agent B 12" Part Deux: EuroBolly 2009 (Eurabia Mix)

This Saturday Bolly Kick SE15 will possibly premiere the new Agent B 12" Compilation "Eurabia" & we'll likely champion some new Eurobolly moves..

Fresh offering of some seriously chutney shakin' noise..

Agent B 12" Part Deux: EuroBolly 2009 Eurabia Mix with Milk and Honey (low quality)

Mix: Orient Express SE15 for sofa, chair & table dancing

Imagine you're on Orient Express off to a glamorous destination for a well deserved luxury break...Are you there yet?
This is your extended...
Hellbound Spellbound Orient Express SE15 From Peckham With Love And Free Hugs Mix - to hear the noise click here
Now with your butt comf on the sofa, chair or even sitting at a table stuffing your face let the top part of your body do the dance or (optional) get the hoover out and do some damn housework..
The rule is, that as soon as you press play you must get at least one body part moving and *not* just your little finger, ok?
Baleh Shava Ole Oy Hoy!
This mix will remain here for 2 weeks only!
After that you will definitely hear some of these tunes in the Orient Express SE15 class!

Orient Combat MiniMix: Jai Ho kicking in the clubs...

Here comes the Jai Ho club remix by Wez Clarke -
It does have that Bhangraerobics kick to it -
- Check it out!

It is a pure kick ass Orient Combat tune.
To listen - click here.

Now when you get old older, you might want to listen to this little Lullaby* in your rocking chair.

* Orient Combat MiniMix

Staying Sane: The Beginnings Mix - Atmospheric Chill and Kick

Time is ticking...
..it's been almost 5 yrs now since the birth of Agent B..
it has happened one summer late night/early morning at a beachclub in a land far far away - location of the fruitful event pictured below..

I was just bored bored BORED of the same ole same ole and thus my romance with Bollywood and World Music began: the AfroCelts with the beautiful vocals of the lovely Sevara Nazarkhan from Uzbekistan (pictured below), Bombay Dreams & Apache Indian, Bluffmaster, a few friendly underground London bands, Fatboy Slim bhangroidal remix, Sertab Erdener and Enigma, some Oriental House, Sean Paul and yet more Bolly (Kisna and Bride & Prejudice) - this collection has started me off on the Agent B. journey..and I never looked back since.

The moody mix on offer today is my first attempt at mixing different genres of music and also my very first attempt at mixing at all...might be a bit ropey. The year is 2004..
The Very First Atmospheric Chill & Kick Mix - listen here.

Mega Mix: Eh, Miss Batty Batty, You are Murder!

A Gastarbeiter handed me a CD, listen to this, he says.

Okay, I say.

And off I go on a mad musical trip around the New Europe diaspora & beyond - Michael Palin eat your heart out!
The track list somehow traces the immigrant's travels za chlebem (Fürs Brot), hunting for a job out in the wide World to secure their existence without leaving their own culture behind and forgetting their roots .
A hint of nostalgia...

The CD is old, all scratched up and am not sure if I can save anything to remaster - it is definitely worth the effort though.

I hear Bollywood & Brazilian reggaeton, Balkan turbo-folk on speed with electric guitars, Celtic violins, a bit of R&B (which I promptly skip), Turkish belly moans; all in da mix with some deep throaty man-groans (not Shaggy though methinks, only if Shaggy can do it in Turkish too..??) and a touch of "taramasalata", I swear it's not all Greek though..

Still recovering from the time bandits' theft of a full hour off the last weekend (how dare they!?), this "mongrelled" collection of songs happens to provide a very unexpected way to make me want to do anything at all on a grey day like this..
I want to share - I have salvaged the tunes and am posting this New Europe Mishmash Murders Batty Batty Mega Mix here for your pleasure.
It is quite raw.

Feel the love

Wasn't feeling it here recently so there..
Feel The Love
Bravo!

Mother's Day Ringtones

Happy Mother's Day!

Here are some ringtones suitable for the occasion..

From the Bollywood movie, Ek Ajnebee:
Mama told me, told me talking to no stranger, told me talking to no stranger..
Ringtone: Stranger is danger!

Remember Ofra Haza?
Here's a little retro remix:
My Mother said, my Mother said, Ya Ba Ye, Ya Ba Ye..
Ringtone: Ya Ba Ya Ba Ye

Enjoy!

Happy St Patrick's Day!

On the eve of St Patrick's Day..

Guinnesss in the fridge? Check!
Silly green hat? Check!
Irish Stew? Errm..not sure..

A ringtone to make you wanna Riverdance-walk down the street? CHECK!

The Benny Lava Riot Mix - Hoovering Motivator Part Deux

Okay! You know it - the house is still in a right mess.
Ha ha ha ha! No problem. Yeah..
Let's get the "housewives moving"!
Mission: Sparkling floors, dinner etc
You have 40 mins 20 secs..
Although by the time you get to "Ek Look Ek Look", the Aloo Chaat is already bubbling merrily in your tummy and we are no longer talking housework (wink wink).
Presenting The Hoovering Motivator Part Deux, a marvellous new Agent B Mix...
The Benny Lava Riot with a hip and a hop - lookie here!

Jai Ho (You are My Destiny) by Pussycat Dolls

I was searching Youtube for the newly released video of Pussycat Dolls' Jai Ho cover - no luck.
Youtube has decided to block access to all the vids posted. How annoying!
Reckon the days of youtube are numbered - is there any point in visiting a site that doesn't let you use it?
Instead I have found this one below which shows the girls performing the song and dance routine live:


Only today (15.03.09) you may also watch the official video for the PD's Jai Ho on aol.
The verdict is: Fantastic!

Dinga dinga dee - Israel's Eurovision entry?

Wrong!
This is clearly Zohan trying to sell riffles to Hindustan (the pretty singing dancing Lalita).
I like. Dinga dinga dee. I know it's wrong. Dinga dinga dinga dinga dinga dinga dinga dee!



There's passion in this. I am quite upset it has received so much petty criticism..
Was Mossad involved in the creative process?
Ah dinga dinga dinga dinga dinga dinga dinga dee!

I'll be back in...Bollywood

Have you heard yet?
Arnie is terminating taking some time off from his busy schedule as the Governor of California to star in a forthcoming tongue-in-cheek Holly-Bolly flick, Incredible Love - Kambakkht Ishq (2009) along with his pal, Sylvester Stallone.
The story line goes something like this:
A Desi stuntman who makes it big in Hollywood struggles in the dating department - a romcom.
Seems like everybody must get a piece of Bolly action these days.
Could it be all these Slumdog Millionaire Oscars?
My my!
Kylie in Blue, Snoop Dogg in Singh is Kinng with Akshay Kumar and now this!
Will they be paid in rupees?
Don't think so..
More later..

A nation without women?

Matrubhoomi: A Nation Without Women



There are no subtitles here for those of you not yet fluent in Hindi alas the story line is self explanatory: "desi girl" is under threat of extinction in preference of sons rather than daughters in some rural areas of India. It has to be seen.

Sita Sings the Blues - The Modern Ramayana with a twist

Sita is a goddess separated from her beloved Lord and husband Rama.

Nina is an animator whose husband moves to India, then dumps her by e-mail. Three hilarious shadow puppets narrate both ancient tragedy and modern comedy in this beautifully animated interpretation of the Indian epic Ramayana.

Set to the 1920’s jazz vocals of Annette Hanshaw, Sita Sings the Blues earns its tagline as..

“The Greatest Break-Up Story Ever Told.”

You can watch it free online - click here.

Read some background info on the story - click here.

Shake Ya Cheque Book - Chikku Bukku Raiyle

Warning! This is a Benny Lava tribute post!

Morning!
Fancy some Kolly for breakfast?

The first one (below) was posted to me as a video response to Mukkala Muqabla on the Agent B youtube channel.

I like it a lot, I love it!
(Big thanks to Rohit Kumar )

Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you...Prabhu Deva, aka Benny Lava, the "Indian Michael Jackson" in Gentleman (1993), his first hit as a star in Kollywood (the Tamil film industry).
Check the way this guy moves!



I have also found this delicious salsa-ish track, Kattana Ponnu...mmmmm I feel a new Benny Lava Fit mix coming up..



Arrgh! All this prancing around - my feet are on fire! Taxi!

Taxi Taxi, Sakkarakatti (2008)



Now this one is truly all over the place. Wow!
Do I hear the words, dinner wid da ladee in di wet red sari ?
A. R. Rahman's usual multilingual acrobatics, Kolly in English and French are beautifully complemented by a sprinkling of Baleh Baleh Shava!, there's reggaeton, reggae influence and even a little Gorillaz flavour, right up my street.
This is just a little taste of things to come - little birdie tells me..

Okay. Yes, I admit - it's an obsession: No problem, Love Birds (1996) with Apache Indian..



And finally, you do know this one, don't you?
Mukkala Muqabla, Kadhalan (1994)
Lyrics here.



BENNY LAVA RULEZ!

Happy Purim!

If you are a religious Jew, today is the day to get drunk so much, you don't know right from wrong..
Let the World know it's time to celebrate - ringtone - click here.
Happy Purim!

Ringa Ringa Ringa!

As promised..
Ringa Ringa Ringa! - the ringtone - click here.

Bollywood booty, anyone?

I want mine bigger! *

This had me in stitches.



Paint yourself with..lurve! Pour that waterfall of lurve on you...
Have you noticed what have I just done here?
Yesss! Lurve & Bollywood at one fell swoop!
Not sure if that's gonna do anything for your butt though..

*says a woman to me after an hour of slaving in Legs, Bums & Abs class.. I say, sit down, honey and have another laddoo..

Kylie goes to Bollywood!

Kylie in a "wet sari"?
The days of "spinning around" in gold hotpants are all over for our well loved Aussie disco diva, it's all about bangles and bindis these days.
"I’ve heard Kylie moves as sweet as she sings, so it’s back to the rehearsal room for me.", says Akshay Kumar (pardon his "Hindi" charm :), a Bollywood action hero to perform opposite the Australian pop princess, Kylie Minogue in a forthcoming mega expensive (28 million dollars) underwater Bolly flick, blue "Blue" to be shot in Bangkok, Phuket & Bahamas.
Following the massive success of the Slumdog Millionaire, the entertainment business has gone all Bolly-crazy.
What's with the Pussycat Dolls recording the "Jai Ho" cover - not bad at all actually. Listen out...you might hear it here.
Could you imagine Kylie would be left behind?
She will be performing a steamy "wet sari" dance routine, which will obviously have absolutely nothing to do with the plot, and singing a duet with Sonu Nigam as well as a solo number, a promo for the film, both written by A. R. Rahman, the celebrated Indian composer (Slumdog Millionaire, Delhi 6 etc).

Well then, can't get you out of my head la la la la la la la la baleh baleh harripa stylee!
Can't wait!
Will the new Mumbai item girl, Kylie, scantily clad in dazzling sprinkles of sequins (perhaps), singing-dancing under water bring in the Bolly-lolly?
Definitely.
Alas if we are to give up Kylie to Bollywood then we demand more Shilpa here.
Are you listening, Mr Ritchie?
I say, Miss Shetty to glam up the "RocknRolla"!

Kylie is no stranger to East-West Fusions.
Below, a clip from Minogue's 2005 Showgirl Tour, "Confide in Me", a Bollywood sequence, choreographed by Akram Khan.

Talking of other interesting Anglo-Indian music collaborations, if you happened to buy a Sony Ericsson walkman phone in India 2 years ago, lucky you, you'd have a supercool world exclusive ringtone - Robbie Williams' "Rock DJ" remix featuring Asha Bhosle.
I'm still waiting to hear this one.
Anyone?

New Agent B Mix: Baleh Baleh A-ha Chutney Kuriye..

..with mango, coconut and a touch of sauerkraut.
The "flying bhangra house" has gone tripping through the tropical spaces today..
Presenting the new mix, including the best track ever, Bhangra Party (at 00:30:43)
A sample of the wonderful lyrics below:

I went to a bhangra party
and I see da people dancin' (dancin')
Hand in di air, foot in di air
and everybody singin' (singin')
All is singin':
Baleh Baleh A-ha Chutney Kuriye
Baleh Baleh A-ha Chutney Kuriye
Baleh Baleh A-ha Chutney Kuriye
Sohniye
A-ha Sohniye
Eh-eh Sohniye
A-ha Sohniye Ah!

So I've spend the whole day in my pj's (for a reason obviously, as you will soon find out).
Was just going to put together a little motivator noise for my music box upstairs to get off my ass and pick up the vacuum cleaner..
Nah. This monster took over my Sunday!
Now if your house is dirty too, you might want to put this..
Chutney Pressure House Bad Boy Immigrant Punk Slavic Soul* Mix
on and off you go flying round your living quarters on a cleaning mission with that extra pelvic thrusting motion pushing your hoover around.
Once you're finished with your house, pop around to sort here this mess too, won't you?
'cause I can't be arsed no more... - time for my traditional date with Jerry Sailor...Ahoy-hoy!

PS If you do get through the initial serving of the "m-a-a-a-ximum beautiful" Balkan flutes
you will survive right through to the worst tune ever...
"all I neeeeeeeeeeeeeed is youuuuuuu whinin' on meee, whinin on meeeeeee"
aka the "skinning-a-cat-alive-in-Trinidad-sound" (at 01:04:05)

*Hence the recorders & violins..

Loose Ramblings..

..about love, passing time and things loosely related...
So I've read a short story* on the "throne" this morning which left me pondering about time and love and time in love drunkenness and the consequences: the times of the inevitable hangover of "the morning after".. Would I write about this!? What a waste of time!
"Lovers who love truly do not write down their happiness."**
Is that so?
Now this was a little dig (no apologies) related to the "related", however I will not even attempt to tackle the subject of verbalising love and (un)happiness here today because..
"..love does not conjugate -- O Lord, in that sense yes, that's all we need! But love has its grammar, even though it doesn't recognise tenses but only moods [!], and only of those, actually: the present in-fin-it-ive. When you love it's forever and the rest doesn't matter. Any old love, no matter what kind. Because it's not true that you get over it -- you don't get over anything, which is a bit of a drawback most times; rather, you bring it along with you..."
Yes, you do. You bring it along with you. Some call it emotional baggage.
It is rather a deposit though, in one's personal bank of experiences.
It is valuable, if only as an afterthought on the crapper.
No tenses but only moods?
I like that very much.
I promise to love and cherish you.. till death..???..blah blah...nah -When I'm in the mood!
And here's a song, my devoted monogamist Gran's fav..

And a somewhat folked-up, brassed-up update..

This happens to be my morning alarm tune..takes the edge off of getting out of bed..

*Claudio Magris, 'To have been'
**Anatole France

Break 4 Lurve - Valentine's Day Workout!

More details: agentbhangra.com

Love Me Babe Love Me..

So the V Day is upon us yet again!
Whether you love it or hate it, it is impossible to ignore it - hence this post!
To show my love... for all things Bollywood I have decided to celebrate St Valentine's Day by....changing my ringtone to something more lovely for a day..
Enjoy!
Love Me Baby Love Me, Horn OK Pleassss - Ringtone

Bring da Kaala Bandar!

When you love a song this much you definitely want your phone to sing it to you, right?
I bring you the....*drum roll*..
Kaala Bandar ringtone - click here!

What happens when we wake up?

The Year of the Rat is officially over, yet I still have strange "ratty dreams" at night...
To fully step into the Year of the Ox I ask myself, in the words of Sanjaya Malakar..
"What happens when we wake up?"
Well, sometimes we happen to come across some profound lyrics..

Sanjaya Malakar - Quintessential Lullaby, the lyrics..

You see the odd manipulation
Of material manifestation
We start to feel the creation
Of a stifled population
So we reach inside each other
To find that thing we must uncover
Finding a way not to smother
The flame that makes us who we are

What happens when we wake up?
When we open up our eyes?
What happens when we wake up?
We’ll uncover your disguise.

From all across the nation we need to
Intend to speculation
We must distribute our frustration
To an unsuspecting nation
And then we realize our delusions
Become by the way of our confusions
We gain collective understanding
And we let ..

What happens when we wake up?
When we open up our eyes?
What happens when we wake up?
We’ll uncover your disguise.

You perpetrate annihilation
And perpetuate segregation
Your distinct becomes contagious
As we isolate our minds
You try inflecting your deception
And belittle our perception
We’ll asses this situation
Before we let it get too far

What happens when we wake up?
When we open up our eyes?
What happens when we wake up?
We’ll uncover your disguise.

Dancing with Kebabs

Tired of screwing..the lightbulbs?
Not quite yet alas...
Just for a day, and it would happen to be Feb 14th, I'd rather be handling a heavy fat wooden club and be surrounded by lots of men, fit men, preferably Persian warriors with rhythm feet and sensational dress sense..*
I have been looking around and found some strange, traditional, eccentric and rather outrageous ways of keeping fit - anything goes on this planet!
This is Zurkhaneh **, a Persian, men only gymnasium, where athletes practise ancient team sports to the sound of a traditional drum.

Try this for seduction techniques..

Alternatively why not do some dancing with kebabs..

Okay. Done!
Who needs to go to Iran?
I can make Zurkhaneh for you "at home".
Would everyone, please, bring 2 massive doners each to the class on Monday.
We will swing the kebabs and see if it cuts the fat.

* The ramblings above are obviously inspired by "Rageh Inside Iran".
** Persian: Power House

I'm back, you f*****s and better than ever!

"I'm bigger, I'm better, I'm stronger, you f*****s."
£125 million in gold bullion to the first one to identify the title quote!
Obviously you'd have to be willing to dive in the English Channel in this weather to collect the prize.
Since I didn't get to "screw the lightbulb" today due to adverse weather conditions in our lovely city , I will be back "bigger, better, stronger, you f....." on Wednesday!
In the meantime enjoy a workout with the better man:

One Monkey in the Snow - found!

Okay! I give up. This is what you want, don't you?
Hey Kaala Bandar, Delhi 6 - the full lyrics.
Check the song preview in the Agent B mix here or listen to the full song here.

Hey Kaala Kaala Kaala Bandar
Bahar hai ya andar
Hey Kaala Kaala Kaala Bandar
Jo dhundhe sikandar

It wasn't me I swear
Everybody's looking for da monkey out there
Hey Kaala Kaala Kaala Bandar
Bahar hai ya andar
Hey Kaala Kaala Kaala Bandar
Jo dhundhe sikandar

It wasn't me I swear
Everybody's looking for da monkey out there
Bring da Kaala bandar
Bring da Kaala bandar
Everybody's looking for da monkey out there

Aao Hum shisha dekhe
Usme sandesha dekhe
Apna Ghayal Hissa dekhe
Apna asli kissa dekhe
Ghonghat ki gehrai mein
Par Phailai kaun
Jhak Safed Libason mein
Kaala sa sach maun hai

Choose le Choose Le choose Le choose Le
Life ki bhaag le
Choose le Choose Le choose Le choose Le
Life ki bhaag le
Thak jhank thak jhank thak jhank
Dil mein bhi jhank le

It wasn't me I swear
Everybody's looking for da monkey out there
Bring da Kaala Bandar
Bring da Kaala Bandar
Everybody's looking for da monkey out there

Kasmein to mumfhali
Jab jee chahe hum khaten
Upper se na na kartein
Par thali aage sarkaten
Ek thali ke chatee bateein
Armaan hai hatte katte
Natak yeh natak natak
Band kar do jhooth ka fatak

Choose le Choose Le choose Le choose Le
Life ki bhaag le
Choose le Choose Le choose Le choose Le
Life ki bhaag le
Taak jhank Taak jhank Taak jhank
Dil mein bhi jhank le

I heard his 2 feet 2 and bites off your knees
I heard he's got metal teeth and wears superman briefs
That makes sense I saw him flying last week but he was invisible
So I saw it moving in the trees
I heard he’s an experiment gone wrong
A monkey alien that must’ve been left in the sun too long
I heard he’s a Cyborg (no way)
Made from parts of a toaster and a nuclear bomb
But who's actually seen him, nobody
This thing seems a little dodgy

Saare rit rivaz hata kar
Dekho apne ghar ke anadar
Shyad kahin kisi kone par
Ghoom raha hai Kala bandar

In galion main rang hain kitne
kitne partein kitne pardey
kitne partein kitne pardey
kitne partein kitne pardey

Aur pardon ke peechhe pardey
aur pardon ke par kahin par
dard chhupaa hai
ghav chhupey hain
dard chhupaa hai
ghav chhupey hain
raaz kayee dabe paaon ghuse hai
jaanke bhi anjaan hai hum sab
paagal ya nadaan hai hum sab
paagal ya nadaan hai hum sab
jaane kaun se rang mein range
hamaam mein hum saare nange
saare nange saare nange
nange nange nange nange nange

Hey Kaala Kaala Kaala Bandar
bahar hai ya andar
Hey Kaala Kaala Kaala Bandar
lo dhoondhe sikander

Alright, but I like the Bandar
Since he came a lot of things changed
Many things have been arranged
There’s way more police in the street
So I feel safe at night when I go to sleep
Now we always got electricity
So I never miss my favourite show on TV
I’m happy with the Bandar as long he don’t get me
He can stay even longer, it don’t bother me
Bandar Kaala Bandar, don’t go away
Bandar Kaala Bandar, I beg you to stay

Choose le Choose Le choose Le choose Le
Life ki bhaag le
Choose le Choose Le choose Le choose Le
Life ki bhaag le
Taak jhank Taak jhank Taak jhank
Dil mein bhi jhank le

There you go! Happy now?
I might even upload a ringtone to match later..
Now I'm off to brave the whole 10 cm of London snow to collect the ingredients for my own homemade yuanyang (Hong Kong style coffee-tea).
Might have to add a shot of Sailor Jerry spiced to stay warm today!

By the way...who is the "black monkey"?

Let it snow, let it snow..

Just a day after the official Chinese New Year celebrations, London has experienced a second "Christmas", a white Christmas too! What are the odds here, a bookie might ask.
We are currently waiting for some more of the white stuff..
Be ye also ready: for in an hour that ye think not the SNOW cometh.
Bolly in da snow, anyone?

Year of the Ox - Disaster and misfortune?

"The New Year was a time when you could change your luck."
"..when the New Year began, not one single speck of dust from last year could remain. Not a single copper's worth of debt could be left unpaid. And not a single bad word could fall from anyone's mouth for three days."
"...And because it is the new year, all debts must be paid, or disaster and misfortune will follow." *
These are all poignant words in the times of the so called credit crunch.
To celebrate the Chinese New Year I have chucked out all the old chintz & almost completely refurnished my house and whilst moving sofas.. sprained my ankle.
Would I be this klutzy if I were born in the Year of the Ox?
If you happen to be in London on Sunday, February 1st, you might want to enjoy the Chinese New Year celebrations in Trafalgar Square and fireworks in Leicester Square.
Here's to new beginnings!
* from "Kitchen God's Wife" & "The Joy Luck Club" by Amy Tan

Happy (Chinese) New Year!

The joys of multicultural London!
We have already celebrated Eid, Diwali, Halloween, All Saints Day, Thanksgiving, St Nicholas Day, Muharram, Hanukkah, Christmas, New Year, Orthodox Christmas & Russian New Year.
Personally I'm waiting for Purim (March 10th), Mitzvah to get so drunk, that one does not know the difference between Haman and Mordechai (or right and wrong) - feels right to me (am obviously very sober, which is very wrong) - then, straight after St Patrick's Day, why not have a blast for Nowruz (Persian New Year) on March 21st.

Today, Monday, January 26th welcomes the Chinese Year of the Ox.
Your friendly Agent B. Moo wishes you..
"Ten Thousand Generations", "Long Life", "Highest Position", "Biggest Prosperity" *, "Gung Hay Fat Choy!"
And this is the ideal tune for the occasion - Tim Sim Vindaloo from the Asian Beats Bazaar.
* from "The Kitchen God's Wife" by Amy Tan

Finally...the new Agent B Mix!

If the Tower of Babel had a soundtrack it would most likely sound very much like the Agent B new mix.
For your pleasure therein mixed are little snippets of what's new, wonderful, stylish, cheesy & eccentric, coming out of the East: Bollywood, Turkey, Eastern Europe and North Africa via France & UK as well as a couple of mash-ups from DJ Earworm, also introducing a fabulous newcomer to the Eurovision song contest 2009 Moscow, Hadise singing for Turkey.
You will find a free ringtone here.
You might hear some of these beats in upcoming Agent B dance fitness classes.
I have managed to squeeze all the tunes in a "little" preview here - Your All New Agent B 2009 Mix.
It is rude not to dance!
Enjoy!

Whatever Lola wants...

...Lola sometimes doesn't get on a Blue Monday.
Blue Monday!? Doom and gloom? Are we living on the same planet?
Today Lola almost got all she wanted - London waited till she got indoors before it opened its skies and rained cats and dogs, just a little drop on my nose as I'm writing this now...in any case whatever Lola wanted was pumping out of her ipod right into her ears. Who cares about the rain, credit crunch, NY resolutions?
Hakuna Matata!
I am working on this eagerly awaited, twisted new mix I have promised a few days back - it is shaping up nicely. In the meantime please get your little preview here - free ringtone.
Yes, it will be cheesy, it will be stylish, it will be energising and it will be all over the place errm.. geographically.
Below Natacha Atlas in a clip from a 2007 comedy by a Moroccan director, Nabil Ayouch, "Whatever Lola wants".

You may also rememeber Chiwetel Ejiofor's own fantastic rendition of Lola in a 2005 British comedy, "Kinky Boots"

I love them both. Do you?

It wasn't me. I swear!

It wasn't me. I swear! Everybody's looking for the monkey out there!
Full lyrics - click here.
That's just a little inspiring lyrical quote from the upcoming Bollywood movie, Delhi 6.
Doesn't this sort of remind you of Manu Chao's "Bongo Bong" ..
Every monkey'd like to be
In my place instead of me
Cause I'm the king of bongo, baby
I'm the king of bongo bong
A prolific genius, A. R. Rahman gave us the soundtrack to Slumdog Millionaire which we have received with awe.
Keep your mouth open - this is a new offering from the same music director:
"Hey Kaala Bandar" from Delhi 6

In any case this certainly is a detox option from a "violent death" by morbid noise I was recently exposed to after a friend's (?) hearty recommendation.
In a way of turning you on to the right side I might be uploading a little medley of some new exciting stuff from the world of twisted Eastern tunes. Keep an eye on this space!

Gas Gas!

Terry Wogan says, 'you either get married or buried to this', and this is where he should have shut his blaspheming mouth, short of advising the general public to go fix themselves a stiff drink.
I am talking of Eurovision Belgrade 2008. I was very annoyed at having to listen to Terry, the prat, talk through the whole of the Bregovic gig so here I am setting this straight.
Please excuse the short Polski voice over at the start.
Put your hands together for Goran Bregovic & the fabulous Wedding and Funeral Band!



I have watched an Englishman acquire a whole new set of motor skills when I played this.

You are my sin....

Here's one of my old favourites, Azis all the way from Bulgaria, singing a Lepa Brena classic, "Ti si moj greh"
And below the original..
I am torn.. which one I like better...???
Wouldn't you like to hear Terry Wogan's informed opinion on these Eurogems?
I know I wouldn't. More on this later.
Do sing along.

Bad Boy ringtone!

Happy Sunny Sunday to You!
Here's a little something...
Free Ringtone - Click Here

And this dirty little number goes out to....

..you know who you are.
Who else?



Now if this is the woman to represent Turkey in Moscow in 2009, A.L. Webber & UK might have to pull another trick out of the hat!

Opa!

Married to....Mrs Dżem

Whisky moja żono..

Cast My Shoe

Another Day..
..another song and a link.
Baleh! Shava!




More Shoe Stories - click here

Survival

Ever found yourself wishing to skip straight to the next weekend on a Sunday night?
These below are a few tunes that can help survive a crabby Monday.
Enjoy!
And do not wait till next Monday to visit my beach again!

When a man lurrrrrrves a woman...

Think locally!

"Immigrant Punk"

"Start wearing purple..."